Despite all efforts of the current administration, America is still the land of dreams. You need proof? Who ever thought that a young, mulleted man taking a bit role among young, mulleted females would go on to become a Hollywood triple (quadruple?) threat and political pot-stirring playboy? Not Jo, Blair, Natalie or Tootie, that's for damn sure. So, George baby took home Best Supporting Actor for Syriana. He did a decent job in the role, but something tells me he got the award as a reward for his weight gain and head injury. Hollywood types are in awe of anyone who will diminish their attractiveness for a role (e.g., Nicole Kidman in The Hours, Charlize Theron in Monster), so that probably had as much to do with Clooney's win as oil had to do with the invasion of Iraq (a.k.a. a lot). Still, I think George deserved some kind of award for his admirable work creating the polished and wise Good Night, and Good Luck. It's pretty much understood that the engraving on the award doesn't necessarily match why it was really given.
I count myself among the "Jon Stewart did a good job as M.C." contingent. He slipped in some of his political acidity, but it went down smoothly. The only wide-sweeping cringe I noticed was after his joke about Walk the Line being Ray with white people. Not working at the top of his intelligence right there, but most of his other quips were excellent (as per usual). Love him so much.
As far as corny Oscar humor, I actually enjoyed Ben Stiller's green screen gag. He had no shame in his antics and shamelessness can be ever so endearing.
Other highlights for me would include the quick cut to J-Lo giggling in the audience at the stage antics of Three 6 Mafia. Homegirl must've been having happy flashbacks to high-speed pursuits through Manhattan with P. Diddy at the wheel and a gat in the glovebox. I would've liked to see a camera cut to J-Lo when Jennifer Garner tripped on her dress. Luckily, J-Ga's heavy-handed bronzer covered any natural blush her misstep might've caused. My favorite mistake was when Ang Lee went all plural on our asses and said, "...gay mens and women." Or was it not a flub at all? Could Ang be that down?
Other clips from the catty department: low-cut dresses + lack of cleavage = crazy unattractive. I guess it's all fierce and shit that Felicity Huffman would bear her ribcage to the world, but she was looking a bit too Oscar-statuesque to me. Better to work the face, hon. You got a pretty one.
And what's up with the washed-out color palette of Naomi Watts and Nicole Kidman? You Aussie gals are pale and skinny enough as it is. You're one step away from disappearing, yo. Next stop: translucence. Anticipated upcoming role: dark matter. My favorite dress design was J-Lo's, although I did not enjoy the dried lawn trimmings shade of green it came in. J-Leprechaun? Nu-uh. Apropos of nothing, is there anyone cooler than Catherine Keener? I don't think so either.
Reese Dub, who I must mention (again) I once spotted in a Whole Foods grocery store looking eerily luminous with baby in tow, gave a sweet speech (although there were suspicious shades of Tracy Flick in it). I still can't bring myself to sit through Walk the Line, but from what I've heard she rocked the mic. Joaquin looked bloated and bitter, so I don't feel bad that his Johnny didn't cash in for him. An even cuter speech giver than Reese? Steve Box of Wallace and Gromit fame. (I still feel badly I didn't give that sweetly satisfying film a nod in my honorable mentions of 2005 list.)
Even though some are whining that Brokeback didn't get the big win because society is still too homophobic, that accusation doesn't really hold water for moi. As Jonny M pointed out, it'd be tough to find a gayer town on the spinning globe than Los Angeles. So maybe, just maybe, it's because it really wasn't the best picture of the year? Could be. OK, so, was Crash a better film? In my personal opinion, yes. Not by an astounding margin, but I remember being semi-rocked to my core (shout-out to Moana) by its blistering examination of racism in sunny L.A. As I've already mentioned ad nictaseum, Brokeback bored me tearless with its soap opera shorthand and long-windedness. Crash did belabor its point(s) and owed a lot to previous films (e.g., Magnolia--even Crash's nominated song was pretty Aimee Mannish). Maybe part of the reason it got the most votes was that entertainment industry types recognized themselves in the Terrence Howard and Sandra Bullock storylines. In the final analysis, though, Crash was smarter than Brokeback. The dialogue was sharp. Even though the cast's screen time was subdivided by the ensemble storytelling, Crash's characters were more fully realized and believable than Brokeback's secondary characters (i.e., all the women). Most importantly, the mirror Crash holds up to society couldn't be more timely (considering the economic/race divide shredding America and the ideological divide severing the world).
Perhaps the most touching thing about Crash winning Best Picture is that Ryan Phillipe can now get his balls out of hock. The boy almost achieved Reese levels of luminosity when he hurtled out of his seat at that award's announcement. He will no longer have to wither in the shadow of her silver spoon. Good on him. And good on my friend who was in Crash, too. You're Oscar-adjacent, young lady.
6 comments:
Nice commentary, Nictate. I like your concise explanation of the reasons Crash is a better film than Brokeback.
It’s interesting that Ang Lee won the Directing award. I would assume that most Academy members voted for the same film in the Best Picture and Best Director categories (since the five nominees were the same in both categories). If that assumption is true, there are basically two ways that the result could have been split, as it was: either (a) some people who voted for Crash as Best Picture voted for someone other than Paul Haggis as Best Director; or (b) some people who voted for Capote, Munich, and GN&GL as Best Picture voted for Ang Lee as Best Director. I think explanation (b) is more likely, particularly since Capote is more of an actors’ film than a directors’ film. In any event, the split result in those two categories indicates that the results in both were likely very close. For example, it’s plausible that the votes in the Best Picture category were something like 38%-37%-10%-10%-5%. Then it would just have taken a very small number of voters “splitting the categories” for Lee to get more votes in the director category.
As for Clooney, I see your point, although I’m not sure he really looks much less attractive in Syriana than in GN&GL. I guess it depends on taste; some people like the grizzled look. I’ve seen 4¾ of the 5 films nominated in the supporting-actor category, and I’d say Clooney’s performance is best of the five (with Dillon and Giamatti close behind). It seemed kind of rude the way Clooney began his acceptance speech (“I guess I’m not winning for director”).
The one thing I’m still wondering about: who was that woman in bed with Jon Stewart at the start? At first I thought it must be his wife, but they implied it was someone else that we were supposed to recognize?
I ran out yesterday to rent "Crash". I hadn't intended to see it, thinking I was going to witness more LA bashing, liberal guilt cliches.
But to my surprise, the film held together. The weakest actors in the story were Sandra Bullock and Brendan Fraser who seemed like they were acting. The racism of the cop played by Matt Dillon seemed overdone, and so did all the seeing the world through racial glasses. Yet maybe that is how we all see the world, and we are just not honest enough to admit it.
"Brokeback Mtn." had very weak supporting characters, despite the praise lavished on them. They seemed to be inserted to give the audience some relief from the homo love story. I didn't buy Jake G as a married man. He would have been much more believable as a single guy who stayed single waiting for Heath to come home.
I found Reese charming in her speech, and then later on I thought about her, and she seems one step away from Stepfordism with her "husband and baby and Tennessee and family" speech. Her husband is a great actor as I saw him in Altman's "Gosford Park". I didn't really buy such a pretty, sensitive boy as an LAPD officer, but maybe there are such angels on the force.
I'm feelin' you on the plunging necklines to no cleavage. Hardly anyone in Hollywood has anything to show in that department because they're all so obsessed with being skinny.
J-Lo's dress was actually tasteful, but her hair was pulled back so tight it was like she was giving herself a facelift.
And boo on the dirty beige dresses.
I guess I won't be wearing a plunging neckline around you then!
comments for everyone!
mathew: only directors vote on directors. actors for actors and everyone for pic. what I think we can assume from this is that the directors preferred Brokeback, but that the actors (which make up the majority of the academy) threw their support behind Crash (as evidenced by their SAG ensemble win, as well).
There were likely not a lot of vote switching as the only people voting on both best director and best picture would be the directors, and why would they change?
I'm also curious which 1/4 of the Supporting Actor films you missed.
the woman in bed with Jon Stewart at the beginning was Halle Berry. She looks a lot different with long extensions. Just as she does with her fake Storm hair.
adam: a lot of hollywood people have the cleavage. fake tits still run rampant.
Jonnym: the five nominees in the directing category are determined by a ballot of members of the Academy Directors Branch only, but then it is all who vote for the recipient of the award from among the five nominees. Check out Rule 11 of the Academy Awards Rules.
Thus there’s no reason to conclude that the Directors Branch preferred Brokeback while the Actors Branch voted for Crash.
At the time I wrote my last comment I was ¾ of the way through Cinderella Man on DVD; I had to pause it to attend to some other things. Now I’ve seen the whole film (which I really enjoyed by the way; it’s too bad the studio chose such a poor title for the film so that nobody went to see it).
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